The peoples’ blog of Matt Hayward

Today I blog to you sore, hung over and all Rockabillied out. It seems someone forgot to tell the Australian Kingswood Factory that loud, local Rock and Roll is dead. I tell you this much, not on their watch.

Last night Melbourne’s Arthouse Hotel was nicely packed out with quiff hair styles and hot rod heels on stunning looking rocker girls resembling the ultimate 1950’s librarian fantasy. If this gig is anything to go by, the Rockabilly scene in Melbourne is burgeoning and god bless it. The mosh was full of familiar friendly faces. And for what may look like an all out fist fight in the most is just good fun fist banter.

Despite the mohawks and barrel chested tall boys that would scare you shitless in a dark alley, toes are stepped on people shoved and even beer spilt. But everyone is friendly and nothing turns ugly. A good night is had by all because thankfully this is a cool scene made up of very cool people. There’s something really funny about a six foot something greaser standing at the edge of a mosh, barely moving as he’s pushed and shoved. All the time balancing his stubby, with his back to the band as if nothing’s happening.

Sure enough as lactic acid seeps its way into every sore muscle of my post mosh body, the Kingswoods did rock. Lyndsey had some wireless guitar cord conception that was awfully modern for the 1950s. But nonetheless it allowed him to romp through the crowd and even jump on my mate Ben’s shoulders for an impromptu off stage piggy back – whilst playing! These guys play good, sweaty raw rock and roll and get a good fan fare doing so.

It seems at least half the mosh know these guys personally. But its the rough as guts Aussie Tinged rock that got them out on a Friday night, not simply helping a mate. Well adept at audience participation, half way through the set, a punter brings three Sambuca shots to the stage in what seems a familiar ritual to the band. It wasn’t the only time the band to and froed with the audience.  This is a band well worth checking out. If nothing else for the colourful tunes and the aesthetic.

You can find out more about the guys here on Facebook.

A fine array of Epiphone Dots. Mine is the colour on top.

This post is prompted by the several guitar store visits where there are many of these models getting around. My model is a Korean made version about 6 years old. I bought mine new and have been very, very happy with it despite its natural yellow, urine like finish. It cost me about $1200 Australian Dollars, which is significantly more than what newer models are going for now. Especially the Dot Studio that goes for around $600.

Now we get to the short and skinny. These sub $1000 versions seem to be made in either China or Indonesia or somewhere. They definitely look the business, but they don’t sound it. I tried a Chinese one out the other day and it totally lacked character. So my advice to you if you want a cheap, quality and versatile guitar look out for the Korean Epiphones from the early noughties. Like the early Ibanez guitars of the seventies, they really rock for comparitively little cash to a real Gibson.

For those not in the know, the Epiphone Dot is a cheaper version of the Gibson ES335 – the Chuck Berry guitar. Its sister guitar is the Epiphone Casino which John Lennon played (They look the same but the construction is more like an acoustic guitar). It’s a semi acoustic with big beautiful F-holes and it’s a big heavy lug that makes a Les Paul look compact. Despite its size, it rewards you with a big, sweet sound and awesome tonal versatility. You can go light and funky or super heavy as you wish, all on the one guitar.

Shane Smith.

Lately I’ve been addicted to the Vice Broadcasting Service (vbs.tv). Not only have they been responsible for epic movies like Heavy Metal in Baghdad, but they relentlessly travel the world showing you places you’d never thought you’d see in your life. I’m talking Liberia, the sewer kids of Colombia, heavy metal mobs on Aboriginal reservations; they literally know now bounds! It’s beyond gonzo journalism or ever war correspondence. They take you to places where war technically hasn’t stopped for 50 years like North Korea. Brining very nicely to the point of this blog: Shane Smith.

Somehow after years of working for a faceless corporate behemoth, I’ve found North Korea both bizarre and strangely intruiging. Perhaps all those bland grey office partitions have got me in the communist mind set. Whatever the reason, I found a Youtube video of Shane Smith going through North Korea as a clandestine filmmaker. I’m assuming that when he went through customs, he did not have to declare the watermelon sized balls he has on one of those arrivals forms.  It seems at no stage of this journey was there no sense of danger. Posing as tourists, at each corner their minders are warning them of the dangers of their actions.

The legend.

So after seeing the North Korea video a few times (it’s just that out there) and Smith’s trip to Liberia it got me thinking. OK so the guy has watermellon sized balls and pretty cool. Then he’s got these features of someone we know and love. So there’s no tell tale warts on the face , but the shortish beard and sideburns and long, greasy looking rock and roll hair. Is Shane the bastard child of Lemmy Kilmister? Quite possibly. After all if Vice is a rock and roll 60 minutes, it’s got to be a little close to the Motorhead ethos?! See for yourself with the photos below. For those of you not familiar with Kilmister’s work

There are a few things that are wrong with this picture though. Note the scarf Shane’s wearrning which is totally un-metal. Oh and in his profile, he admits to signing the Bloc Party to his label. Even if he is Lemmy’s bastard son, he would still be hung at dawn for that in my book. At the very least, daddy Kilmister should give his kid a hiding for it! Anyway check out Motorhead and Vice TV for youself. Make your own mind up.

For those who think political satire is dead, check this out. This movie is Yes Minister for a new generation. One can’t also help but think that they’ve seen the Australian ABC TV show ‘The Hollowmen’ as well. They are a hair’s breath away from each other. At the end of the day though, that really is inconsequential, because this is an amazing movie in its own right. In the Loop brings political satire into the modern age of Conservative US/British politics via the Gulf War (the current one) and how ministers and mingling US back benchers all are so fervently trying to tone down talk of war, they almost start one.

I’d tell you more about the plot, but it’s not really that important to why I enjoyed it. Maybe it hits a raw nerve for me. This movie portrays generation Ys as ambivalent morons with no conscience, in a society where OHS rules don’t guarantee fair treatment or fair play; the Scots are the underlords keeping politics in check with a filthy tongue and an iron fist and the Americans are cringe-worthy in their conservative self righteous bland-ness. Whereas the English, as always, are bumbling and polite as always. In other words, it was written for pommy in-greats like me! All second-guessing their way through what would be a political thriller if any one of the main characters had a clue what’s going on!

If nothing else, you get a cameo from Steve Coogan (of Alan Partridge Presents and Saxondale fame) as an Irate constituent. For Sopranos fans, there’s also James Gandolfini playing an American army general, who’s become a git gun shy with age. Truth be known, there’s no dead wood in this movie. It would almost even work as a stage production. The two senior UK media advisers (both Scots) are like UK Ari Golds with their demeaning and chauvinistic one liners.

A character that really grabbed me was Toby Wright (played by Chris Addison). This guy is central to my earlier Gen Y comment and is a media adviser to a new British government minister. Yet a weak gust of wind would change his opinion on any subject you cared to mention – oh and his commitment. He really nailed what’s wrong with politics in general when a guy like this can even get a Guernsey in politics, let alone a job packing boxes.

For those of you who are politically savvy and like a bit of dark British satire, check it out. You won’t be disappointed. I sincerely hope though in January that this isn’t the best movie I see all year.

Yes I’m a huge Bon Scott fan. No I’m not a big Brian Johnson fan. After reading this book though, there’s probably no one else in the world I’d rather have a beer with. In much the same vein as the Top Gear guys put out books of their newspaper columns, this book is short and punchy. It’s a bit ‘This is your Life” Detroit style. Where instead of popping open a big red, leather clad book, a bottle of Jack Daniels is cracked and the bonnet is raised on some precious metal rather than long lost love appearing centre stage out of nowhere.

Quite literally Johnson have time-lined his life in cars. There’s plenty of highs and lows. From lights randomly popping out of his Lotus to the abject misery of owning anything made by British Leyland. There’s the odd insight into life on the road. Whether it’s bunking on the tour bus or being chauffeured around Europe in an executive limo in style. His band mates don’t make it out unscathed either and there’s plenty of falling in love on the road. Only with British convertibles and not slutty groupies.

It’s full of short, funny (some very funny) and punchy anecdotes. Via cars, he manages to leave no part of his life unscathed and that’s what’s truly miraculous and perhaps why Johnson decided to go this route for his biography – and it does work. There’s a sense that as a standard biography it would be too tight lipped and laconic. No question he has no problem opening up over some put banter about his cars though. But sadly it kind of lacks substance. Honestly I read this book cover to cover in three days. A decent reader could easily do it in a night. Not to Johnson’s detriment. This is a fantastic read. If only it could be longer.

The other week I was trundling through the tourist thoroughfare of The Rocks in Sydney. Basically looking at a bunch of tourist crap wondering why I was there in the first place. Then something grabbed me:

Dream Car
71 LT Celica – 13B Turbo
42mm waste gate  – shod with 305/28/18 (?)
plenty o poke – jaw dropper – ball tearer
goes like stink – chick magnet
no tyre kickers

This shit is a GTR XU1 Torry and looks bloody awesome.

But it wasn’t in a newspaper ad in the Trading Post or a bulletin board. It was on a T shirt. Yes a proper, well fitted, stylishly put together t shirt. And it wasn’t on some iron on transfer or crappy shirt the quality of toilet paper either. Proper artist designed, screen printed cool Aussie car t-shirts! Finally!

The bloke behind the stall, behind the shirt is a Sean Carver. Not someone I know from Adam to be honest. But as Merrick and Rosso would say “what a top little Aussie!” Sean has designed a whole bunch of t-shirts around the kind of cars that are Aussie folk lore. From the HQ coupe driven by the Night Rider in Max Max, to the Kombi van, to our very own Sandman vanel pan! All are done in the classified newspaper ad style with a liberal dose of Aussie slang from the ‘very toey’ to ‘the duck’s guts’.

Thankfully, Sean’s caught onto the interweb at seancarver.com.au. He must know how much I usually loathe going to Shitney!  Anyway, I honestly was blown away by the design, coolness and originality of his shirts and wish I could’ve have got a load more.  So if you have a man in your life that still rushes home to read the Trading Post every Thursday to look for dream cars, this could be their bogan haute coture! God knows it’s now mine. Nice one Seano.

Renting a car is a lucky dip. Then again I was never a fan of lucky dips. So when promised with a Hyundai Getz “or similar” on a recent trip, my expectations weren’t high. Lo and behold, when the car arrived at the rental desk, it was a Suzuki Swift! Things were starting to look up.

Despite never driving a Getz, it doesn’t reek of likability in the same way the Suzuki does. With the GTI of old fondly in peoples’ memories, it’s not hard. But how does the modern Swift stack up? First of all on streets of Sydney, this car is an absolute god send. Being on holiday, who wants to park a barge? This car easily fits between 4WDs and much bigger pieces of metal.

On the road, the Swift definitely has aspirations that in this basic rental car spec didn’t quite stack up. On its fifteen inch rims, it’s a very, very firm ride for a small car. While I don’t mind a firm suspension, it must knock the false teeth out of old ladies’ mouths, who I assume this thing’s targeted at. Also the base spec engine seems more suited to the highway than tight corners around town. While it doesn’t mind sitting on 110kph, it’s certainly not rev happy. In fact I think someone hypnotized mine and told it is a six cylinder taxi running on gas. By comparison the Seat Ibiza I had in Croatia had a smaller engine, but far more revs and aural charisma. To my mind that makes for a much more enjoyable and better small car.

For such a small car with so much spirit (well potential), it just whezzed its way through the gears, providing something that wasn’t quite torque or power. Just enough to get you around. Oh and did I mention the 3 speed auto? Come on Suzuki, you can do better than that! Build quality wise, the little Swift is easily on par with anything from Toyota – if not better.It feels incredibly solid and all interior fit is pretty decent.

All in all I’d love to drive a sportier model. It is a fun car to drive, at least in its grip and handling. It’s poised and champing at the bit to go. But with that boring engine and transmission, it’s not quite the thrill ride. More the jarring ride!

Hairy rock and roll geeks representin'

Some weeks in podcasting are just gold. Michael Butler, the rock and roll geek in his aptly named Rock and Roll Geek show interviews Nardwuar the Human Serviette this week. These two guys are great rock nerds that have been doing podcasts for quite some time. Well Nardwuar has since before podcasts on college radio for decades!

But first let’s talk about the relative newbie. For a few months now I’ve been catching the RNR Geek Show through iTunes. Michael Butler [host] is a ‘have bass will travel’ kind of professional muso that focuses most of his efforts on podcasting these days. He’s played in bands such as Exodus and now plays in Jetboy amongst many others. Each week he puts out about an hour long podcast on anything from classic, commercially ignored rock albums to his favorite recipes. If nothing else, he’s very easy to listen to and extremely consistent. As a bass player, his insights into the recording of classic albums makes for good geek listening too.

Nardwuar is the master of a bizarre, kind of take-the-piss-and-run style of interviewing. Yet true to his bizarre roots, the quality of his research is often flawless, often flabbergasting the interviewee. He’s an icon in his native British Columbia, Canada and a veteran of plaid clothing! Since 1987, there’s no one that Nardwuar hasn’t interviewed – well no one that matters anyway. From getting dangerously close to offending a still young Henry Rollins, to blindsiding President Gorbachev in a passe press conference. He’s driven several interviewers to take unusual and often confrontation actions, including has been porn mogul Al Goldstein, has been Skid Row rocker Sebastian Bach and Alice Cooper. Along the way, he’s befriended Jello Biafra, Josh Homme and Joey Shithead from DOA to name a few and gotten himself beaten up by Sonic Youth!

In short there’s no one in this world quite as out there as Nardwuar, and this is one of very few times I’ve heard him as the subject of an interview. He still speaks slightly in character (perhaps he’s become the character) but also topically about his music, past experiences and how he earns a crust.

Despite not being through Mr Butler’s preferred feedback channels, I’d like to thank you very much for the Nardwuar interview. I share your admiration for the guy and he’s definitely a bona fide rock geek god. Definitely one of your better ones, a real surprise and a real treat. Keep it up. For the love of god, check it out!

ITunes users can find the interview by searching the iTunes store for ”. Otherwise find it on the Rock and Roll Geek Show web site. And don’t forget to check out the masses of interviews at Nardwuar.com! Doot-do-da-doot-do…Doot-do.

On the corner of High and Williams Roads, you could very easily overlook this newish restaurant. While Hebron may conjure up images of Palestinian or Isreali food, it’s a very fresh view on Korean cuisine.  While the menu cites biblical inspiration for the name, it also is very quirkily categorises Korean classics under a Hollywood movie names (I think the mains were called Forest Gump). One thing is for certain is that this isn’t your typical generic Korean restaurant. It’s fresh, quirky and a little bit funky.

Despite all this, thankfully the food lives up to the livery. They have a baby squid dish (my memory’s on the fritz) that is superb.  There’s plenty of seafood and interesting salads. It does get quite a bit hot and spicy but nothing that’s overtly bum burningly hot for the sake of it (apparently my company and I went quite red). All the flavors work and everything has a contemporary touch to make it a bit unique. Heaps of Kim Chi and side dishes are there to spice up the journey as well, though I guess it wouldn’t be Korean without it!

Without question, this is a very original, truly unique cafe cum restaurant casual dining experience. One that definitely is worth the wander down from Chapel St, or at least off the beaten Williams Road track. This place might be a bit too cutesy for the lads, but it’s bona fide A grade date material. And it goes without saying, there will never be another Hebron. I hope this place does really well. They deserve it.

For the unacquainted and perhaps normally uninterested, LED technology is the latest thing in TV. I would count myself normally in both categories. Thankfully it’s actually something quite special. Right now the Samsung is the latest thing out there. Don’t be wooed by the run out LCD Samsungs and sub $1000 plasmas, LED is the shizzle. Why? Well, firstly it’s super thin. Not just thin compared to traditional CRT screens, it makes cigarette papers feel fat. It also has a specially designed, albeit slightly more expensive than normal, slim bracket. With this bracket the screen literally hangs from the wall like a painting. There’s literally about 3-4cm of width from the wall when mounted. That’s significantly thinner than plasma or LCD tellies.

Picture quality wise, it’s a perfectly dark picture, full of contrast. Put the superseded Samsung LCD next to the LED and for my money there’s a big difference. And not just in the price, because they’re really running those LCD tellies out cheap at JB Hi Fi. Sadly not cheap enough. Because look at them side by side and you can’t kid yourself. There’s a noticeable difference in picture quality. The speakers are exceptionally good for what they are and how slim the TV is. One downside is though that it only has optical audio out, which doesn’t work with my stereo system of choice. Aside from 3 HDMIs and a USB, you only get one composite port and a high definition composite port. So this may mean upgrading your DVD player etc to the latest spec equipment.

Feature wise, we contemplated getting the higher spec Series 7 or Series 8 TVs. Primarily because the have internet capabilities and can play videos from your media library using DLNA. These didn’t really stack up as who wants to watch grubby Youtube clips on a wide screen TV and I already have the capability to watch files from my media library. The Series 6 is more than enough.

If you are interested in LED, don’t be put off by the player haters. Apparently it’s not a true LED TV and is only back lit with LEDs. Count everything in the room and square root it by the number of fingers and toes you have, and that’s how little I care about that fact. Many places aren’t interested in selling these TVs yet, probably because they’re still stocked up with older models gathering dust. If you can wait they will get cheaper, great. I’m told they will be much cheaper at Christmas time. But you will be no closer to the end of the rainbow for waiting. There a great quality TV and well worth the investment now.