The world adores matt hayward

I bought this book to read on the plane to Croatia. It’s probably perfectly suited to flying reading, but unless your plane has been delayed 3 hours don’t bother!

May’s quirky style means each rant, or chapter, is no longer than 5 pages. While I find him hilarious on Top Gear, I only got about two giggles out of this book. What really irritated me was not the lack of consistency between topics, but the continuity. Some ramblings were written 2 years ago and others 2 days ago. So one minute he’s talking about a Top Gear episode in 2004 he mentions is soon to be airing, the next something that hasn’t aired yet. Surely a good editor could have smoothed out these bumps?

If you like short, witty ramblings, you may (no pun intended) enjoy it. If not, you may as well spend your $20 down the pub. At least you’ll get a drink out of your hard earned.

Seldom do cook books truly overwhelm, but I am in awe of this one. The Curry Bible is nothing short of brilliant. Not that it’s hard covered, or 800 pages (it’s probably 150 odd). It doesn’t need to be. If the house was burning down though, this would be the one cook book I’d take with me.

Chapman is an English lad (presumably half caste) with a great insight into the methods and traditions of the curry. He lists the top 20 curries of the UK, each with its own story of how it came to be. These stories are worth the price of admission alone. For example, one curry that was invented by irate curry shop owners when pissed, racist Pommies would come in asking for something extra hot.  Kind of like a curry shop owner’s revenge!

Each of the curries has variations too, e.g. restaurant style, or traditional, vegetarian, you name it.  Each recipe is also broken down into its elements and nothing is left out. For example, how to make ghee, garam masala, a good curry ‘gravy’ etc. So after a few recipes you can start making your own variations.

Also handy is the A-Z of spices scattered throughout the book. Again explaining the etymology and how to use them. Chapman has truly left no stone unturned.

You don’t have to be a great cook for this. But the results will make others think that you are. Look at any other curry recipe in isolation and you’ll feel overwhelmed. Chapman has succeeded in making a book that’s both enjoyable readable and simplifies the art of curry making. Brilliant stuff.

Well I’m now back in civilisation after Christmas with the family. Just wanted to say a belated merry Christmas to all. Thanks to all who sent cards and text messages on the day.

Special shout-outs to those who supported us in Movember this year (especially one very generous person), and the Herald Sun for publishing our pic the day after. Our group raised twice as much money as last year, for diseases described by Al Pacino in Donny Brasco as ‘cancer of the cock’.

2008 will bring some challenges. Extra special shout-outs for those having kids (you know who you are!) or buying houses in the new year. All the best and good luck for future challenging times.

To all the player haters doing MBAs, you’re not automatically MVPs. Please for the love of god, DO SOMETHING ORIGINAL! Remember when the objective of post grad education was to learn something to better yourself, not instant career gratification? To learn something you may apply one day, not just because everyone else in your department is doing it?

If you’re doing one, or some other high falutin post grad that you think earns you wanker points in conversation, in the words of Johnny Rotten ‘how lovely for you’.

Nonetheless, the best of luck to even the player haters anyway.  Thanks to Ice T for the ebonics!

Anyways, as the years get quicker and tougher, all the best and good luck. Happy 2008 to all from the dodgiest blog in town! Shalom! Peace!

This year it was a big call for what to match to the Christmas turkey. There were a few cherryish pinots from the Yarra Valley which i’ve grown fond of, but they’re nowhere near ready yet. There are big cab savs, but you’d need a really old one that had a bit of grace about it. This was the year for an odds on bet. I took out a 2002 Petit Verdot.

Make no mistake this is not a trendy wine. For a start it’s from the Murray Valley region, not some glitzy South Australian region. It’s also worth saying that despite the five gold medals on the label (not like the bottle pictured), it cost less than twenty bucks in a corner store. What it was, from this winery and in this vintage, was a sensation.

This verdot, with five years in the bottle, had been aged properly and had lost its harsh tannins. It had a very luxurious fruit/acid balance, with a subtle tinge of cranberry that suits roasted turkey. Mouth finish was viscous and bang on perfect.

If you’re wondering why you haven’t seen verdot anywhere it’s simple. It’s not cool. It’s been an anonymous blender in Bordeaux blends since Adam was a boy and the vine looks like brambles in full bloom. When most wine makers will only mix about 4% of petit verdot with a Shiraz or something red, you get the idea how hard it is to make 100% of it taste great.

So my advice to you is this. If you see a 2002 Trentham Estates verdot, just buy it and drink it now. Don’t go pass go, don’t collect $200. Just get the corkscrew and a nice looking woman. After the requisite five years it’s sublime. You won’t find one. But if you see a 2004 or 2005, I reckon it would actually be better.

If you drink it before hand, it will be a bit more gruff and in your face. But if you’re patient it will royally award you with something very special at a very bargain basement price.

If you’re like me you don’t like snow domes and kitschy spoons as souveneirs. You’d rather bring back something genuinely local from that place, like a CD, even if it’s never listened to. So what a surprise when it turns out to be pretty listenable.

Hladno Pivo is Croatian for ‘cold beer‘. Like a lot of punkers, they’ve come from rock bottom (paricularly in the post war years) to doing pretty well for themselves. This 2006 CD ‘Knjiga Zalbe’ looks like no expense was spared in its packaging or production. So resting on their laurels a bit, this is not hard core skater punk, it’s a lot more polished than that.

What Hladno Pivo are all about now is a more pop-punk tinged with blue collar acoustic ballads. Imagine Jimmy Barnes as a Croatian drunk and not a Scottish drunk. There’s a lot of pop punk riffage, and even the odd death metal departure. Bioloski sat even has some electric blues harp. Fortunately, it’s all cohesive and all sounds pretty good. If these guys weren’t so good, it would sound a lot worse. Although you can imagine a bunch of dissapointed Croat punkers longing for the old straight up punk stuff.

And no I can’t understand a single word of Croatian. But this is still bloody enjoyable! And let’s face it you can’t get more punk rock than calling your band cold beer.

On a completely separate note, the CD packaging itself mocks a Soviet complaint book. These are a communist artifact still mandatory in pubs and clubs in Croatia. Basically the owner of the place has his complaint book reviewed by the government at the end of the year and pays a fine according to the condition of his book. So despite looking very posh, this cover is the ultimate in punk rock, as each page is a complaint about a member of the band!