The world adores matt hayward

Well well well… Thanks to some overly pragmatic Swiss domain registrars, my web site is back up. Why did it go down you ask? Well it was a domain transfer that went horribly wrong. First the DNS settings were wrong (the transfer set them back to the defaults). So I tried to log into my account and correct them. Dang it! I forgot the password. So I reset it. Wrong thing to do. Because I can’t get to my email, because that too is based on the matthayward.com domain!

So why are the neutral Swiss to blame? Well, they wouldn’t give me any alternative to resetting my account password. So I had to send a fax  to Switzerland to request the management of this domain to be moved to another login. Then the sat on it for 5, count ‘em, FIVE whole days. Five days without email or a web site. What really ticks me off is it wasn’t some nerdy lawmakers that decreed a five day wait. It was them! So there was no reason for my web site to be down but for these dumkopfs sitting with their thumbs up their arses!

Anyways, lo and behold your irate blogger is back. This time with a genuine grievance. And you Swiss putzs should stick to pretending to be French and German and making cheese.

This one i’ve been saving for a while. If you ever suspected Jeremy Clarkson was a twat, well here’s the proof. Almost 7 minutes of the best of the worst of Top Gear. And it seems virtually all of it is Clarkson stuffing up! Enjoy. Censored, but might require subtlety at work

That’s right. This week our own Prime Minister, or should I say ‘il Duce’ has announced his Fascistic intentions. On last night’s 7.30 Report on ABC TV, he started talking about ‘aspirational nationalism’. Make no mistake, just about any Fascist movement ever has had nationalism in there somewhere. I’m not suggesting for one second Mr Howard is jumping to the centre of politics, but whoever’s writing his speeches should’ve pulled him up on it.

And this whole notion of federalisation? Are you insane! The Labor state governments are the only thing standing in the way of this guy running the country! Besides local affairs need local representation, not a one size fits all approach to one of the most geographically dispersed democracies in the world - well at least while it still is. Dear boy, you’re showing your age. Time to smell the roses and retire.

John Howard the Fascist! (well a link to a newspaper article anyway).

This week’s wacky moment is from a classic 1988 movie, The Decline of Western Civiliation part II: The Metal Years. Classic because it’s the most amazing expose of hair metal and all its tragedies - or tragics! And Chris Holmes of W.A.S.P. is the keynote speaker. if you’ve ever Googled ‘drunken fuckwit’, no doubt this guy would come straight up. Watch as he lives up the rock star life, with his mum (and presumably only friend) in tow after god knows how many bottles of Smirnoff. God metal was cool. I wish they would put this movie out on DVD in region 4.

 I used to love this movie as a 15 year old git. Watch this clip and you’ll probably understand why.

Heh, another week another wacky moment from Youtube. This week, still sticking with The Ramones, I found an episode of the Drew Carey show (circa 1998??) where Drew and the boys were starting a band. As part of the episode, they had cameos from all the cool guitarists of the day. Namely, Lisa Loeb, Rick Neilsen (Cheap Trick?), Slash, Matthew Sweet, Dave Mustaine (Megadeth) and especially Joey Ramone.

This one is funny, because Joey as far as I know can’t play guitar, and he especially can’t trash them either! But watch the 3 Drew Carey characters try not to piss themselves laughing when they get to the line "sorry, but we’ve already got a tall, skinnny guy!" (Joey was about 6′ 7"). Then as Joey storms away in disgust, the guitar chord gets caught on his boot, dragging the guitar along, making him look even more like a doofus. Champagne comedy.

Also available

• Slash auditions for Drew Carey
• Dave Mustaine auditions for Drew Carey

If you’re Australian you will know of the inimitable music guru Molly Meldrum. If you’ve ever drawn breath, you will know of equally inimitable Joey and Johnny Ramone from The Ramones. This has to be the biggest culture clash of the century. This one probably isn’t for those of you who like vivid colourful movement or lively conversation. In fact I don’t think i’ve ever seen anyone so sedintary as Johnny. But as always The Ramones rocked, and Molly, well he just keeps being Molly. This is worth watching just to see Johnny Ramone say ‘Briz-bayne’ and ‘Mell-bouuuurrrne’. Bloody priceless.

When will America wake up and smell the bullshit? Robe Lowe is using his acting kudos to preach hybrid cars to Capitol Hill’? In this Autoblog Green article, there’s a Youtube video of newfound hippie Rob Lowe preaching the merits of hybrids a House Committee. How much is enough?! I mean GM produced a perfectly awesome FULLY ELECTRIC car in the 90s that could make mince meat of a Corvette (in a straight line) and decimate a Prius at saving the planet. But we’re still going to pretend that hybrid and alternative fuels are the only solution? Is our only salvation in warm fuzzy actors and not scientists and analysts? Did we never learn anything from Reagan and George HW Bush?

I just want to end on an anecdote. The reason we’ve never seen a crash test in a hydrogen powered vehicle is because the resulting explosion would probably destroy the whole Melbourne CBD. This is why I agree with your sentiments Rob, but keep your politics to The West Wing, and go back to shagging under age girls in your spare time. Until Detroit can find a way to put the consumables (all the profitable, servicable bits on cars) into electrics, there is no environmentally friendly solution. And all Lowe’s patriotic schooozing (Check the video. It’s pretty naff) ain’t going to do anyone but yourself any good. But hey, I guess that’s the intent.