Strangely, it never rains in Lima – ever. It just kind of spits when it does. There’s only 3 months in the year when the sun does shine and the rest of the year it’s plain clouded and moggy. But is there anything to do? Well not hugely.

We stayed in a nice middle class suburb Mia Flores away from the hustle and bustle. It could be a suburb anywhere in the world, like Toorak in Melbourne, San Francisco who knows. There’s not a lot going on but it’s safe and there’s all the normal US style shopping malls etc.  It’s a nice big warm fluffy comfort zone. Walk down to the JW Marriot Hotel and there’s a massive beach side plaza full of TGI Fridays style restaurants and fashion stores.

When we did venture into Lima proper, it was not the lawlessness and debauchery I expected. Typically for Peru, they have a Plaza De Armas, some great churches. If you’re lucky enough, you can see the changing of the guard at the government buildings, a la Buckingham Palace in UK. Despite all that, Lima isn’t gringo central and there are nowhere near as many street hawkers and crap merchants hassling you as in say Cusco. Wandering around the town centre, there’s a few very cool bookshops and plazas. Even the odd tapas and vino bar.

Sadly I didn’t spend too long in Lima. But the anxiety about being rolled or worse seemed unwarranted. If you go, keep your big city smarts on you and stay in one of the ritzier suburbs and you’ll be fine. Keep obvious tourists traits to yourself and take it all in.

Is it worth staying in Lima? Well Mia Flores is definitely the best place to wind down your holiday. Because you can have all the big city creature comforts yet it’s still foreign and interesting enough to amuse you. Especially after a Maccu Picchu trek, it’s worthwhile place to chill. But it’s definitely not a Peru highlight.

Apparently Cusco and Arequipa have an age old rivalry going. But the later being the second biggest city in Peru and far less touristy, I´d have to say Arequipa is way better. It feels more like a European, sophisticated vibe and you say ´No Gracias´a lot less to street hawkers.

If you´re wondering what there is to do aside from all the great restaurants and bars, you can even see a frozen mummy. That´s right, about 5 years ago this explorer bloke  found an Inca teenager who was sacrificed to the gods by the Incas. The mummy, named Juanita, is about 400 odd years ago.

Because the sacrifice site was at such high altitude (six kilometres above sea level, and two kays higher than Maccu Pichu), she has been preserved near perfectly, hair, skin, shoes clothing and all! Anyway, if you´re lucky enough, she will be on display in the museum, at minus 20 degrees celcius in a bespoke glass case. An awesome site. Goriness aside, it´s also a really big insight into the Inca culture and why the hell the slaughtered perfectly innocent girls. And why not.

But before you start thinking I travel just to see old mummies (there was the mummies of Vodnyan in Croatia as well), I´m checking out the Colca Canyon tomorrow, which is meant to be way bigger than the Grand Canyon in the US. Stay tuned.

Firstly altitude is a bitch. Many people fly into Cusco from other high altitude spots like La Paz in  Bolivia and so they´re already well adjusted. But if you´re doing Peru only, then take care on your first few days. My advice is if you´re coming directly from your own (low altitude) country, check into your hotel, get a really plain meal for dinner (no rich restaurant food), drink plenty of water and go straight to bed. Do not pass go, do not collect $200. You will feel like death warmed up. So don´t waste your money on a great meal you can´t eat!

Secondly, Cusco is a bona fide tourist town. It´s a cliche used widely in the west, but until you´ve experienced it here, you have no idea. Some pubs even sell a T shirt with ´No Gracias´ on it to fend off the local vendors. It´s also a bit sleazy at night with people offering you free drinks and stuff. Leading me onto my next point.

Regarding alcohol, take it easy champ. There´s plenty of bars but with less oxygen in your lungs, you´re gonna get drunk a lot quicker and end up like a fourteen year old mess. And you will be dehydrated as hell and up all night pissing. No fun. So at least for the first couple of days, maybe lay off the piss!

Oh yeah, and the coca. It´s everywhere. Drink plenty of coca tea, or even better buy the coca flour which will sort your right out. But you ain´t gonna get stoned off it champ. You can chew coca leaves to your hearts content and you won’t be like Tony Montana on Scarface. It fixes your digestion and altitude sickness though.

Finally, trouble. Especially in the main plaza in Cusco, there are cops everywhere. They are really making a concerted effort to stop violence against tourists. But a poor bloke got mugged the second night we were here, just outside our window. An Aussie guy that has a restaurant here told me it was absolutely remarkable – because the tourist police here crack down HARD on anyone that mugs a tourist. While I believe him, there are no street lights here and there´s plenty of steep dark alleys. So if you´re not absolutely knackered at night from sightseeing, either stay right in town or have early nights.

Anyway, that´s the load off my mind. Next comes the happy stuff, of which there´s plenty!